eyes without a face

It's been a long time since I wrote something in my journal; I haven't made myself busy like I normally would. I would always work myself on a concept themed shoot, or attend events, or just get myself involved with a project, but lately there hasn't been something that presented itself interesting. 

I have been detaching myself more from the people I knew, A lot has been wondering why we haven't started our year and why has The Asylum been missing out on events and pulling out from shoots... It has come to our attention to where and who I will prioritize as part of a focused business plan, which I mentioned in my facebook page not so long ago. What I really meant, there are so many things I want to do, work on, people who I want to collaborate with. People who are worth my time, setting my priorities straight which I haven’t been doing in a long time, and for the very first time, I begin to see the big picture in detail. A risky strategic move to cater only small groups and highlighted events in which our services are most needed.  Like I mentioned just the people I want to collaborate with are mostly friends, people in my circle of trust, I have been clinging on the wrong people, and when it was too late, the rumors has been spread, and it killed me.

You may hear there and then I am like this but people who know me best, know who I am really.  I am avoiding the scenes lately that can bring me down Furthermore I personally pulled out s connections and support to The South Otaku United of the Philippines or Soup. Once my pride, now they call themselves the South side. I literally remove myself from all responsibility and affiliation, knowing that this group can tear me apart.

What now - from the day I started through mobile phone photography to picking my first digicam to holding a DSLR at my hands, to shifting myself to mirrorless... I will never stop evolving... I won’t stop getting crazy... I will continue to do my best.

I haven’t fully pushed the team, nor they have heard much from me, maybe this direction I am hoping for is the right one, by then, there isn’t an option for me to turn back and stop. Everything is a rush since the last three months, like never before I have put myself this far.  Lao Tzu once said “Manifest plainness, Embrace simplicity, Reduce selfishness, Have few desires.” I will do so, remove myself that bring me down so I can just keep moving forward, and it is not because I want to be successful, because I need to survive, to get through the abyss I am in at the moment.